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How To Handle Loneliness When You Can’t Find People

I write this in the middle of a pandemic. Yet long before covid, there was another ongoing epidemic that was also costing lives and damaging health. Loneliness.

Many such articles talk about the need to develop friendships. That’s good advice of course. But it doesn’t happen overnight. Even if it did, lockdowns mean you can’t be with the people you do have. So what about now? What can you do in the meantime to look after yourself?

The DIP Loop Model of Anxiety

This is a new model of anxiety that I have devised. My aim is to help clients understand what is happening, and to understand how best to overcome it.

I give particular thanks to the research work of Lisa Feldman Barrett. Her concept of the “predictive brain” was the missing piece in my thinking on anxiety. It also provides an extra, important element to models that currently exist.

What If The Change You Need Isn’t About You?

When people come for therapy, they usually want one of two things: support or change.

Support while they travel through one of life’s inevitable sticky patches.

Change to bring about some transformation in life. This post is about change.

Often, when people think about change and therapy, we think it is the person who needs to change.

Is Shame Stopping You From Enforcing Your Boundaries?

When Brene Brown studied people, she found something strange.

The nice people who accommodate everybody else were not nice at all. They were seething with resentment.

They seem nice. No matter what you ask, they’ll do it. Any change to agreed plans, they’ll accept it. Any extra mile you ask them to go, and they’ll go there.